Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Moony, Wormtail, Prongs, and....

I saw a commercial the other night for Kinoki foot pads. They're supposed to draw toxins out of your body when you tape them to your feet each night. You can tell that they're "working" by the fact that they turn brown by morning.

I can certainly believe, based on some aromatic feet that I'm sure we've all run into on occasion, that people might come to the conclusion that feet have some kind of toxic waste dump aspect to them. However, if our bodies had such a hard time excreting toxins, we'd all be dead. Also, how does it make any sense at all for toxins to be forced out through the thick skin of the feet?

So what does remove toxins? IANAD, but the Intarwebs tell me that exhalation, urination, and defecation are natural ways, and dialysis and (in limited circumstances) chelation are artificial ways. Sweat is not, and magic maxipads are not.

Practitioners of "alternative medicine" (scare quotes are intentional) often say that Big Medicine and Big Pharma are in it for the money, and the little Sellers of Complementary and Alternative Medicine are just out to help the little people. I doubt that's true in all cases.

So is snake oil an oil made from snakes, or is it something you put on a snake? Or both?

4 comments:

CrankyProf said...

Your last statement raises interesting questions about baby oil...

Jen said...

I spent a summer on a farm in Italy years ago. They had their own olive presses to make olive oil. Huge vats for the process. Crankyprof added an unimaginable image to my library...

Angry Professor said...

Did you see this comment in the reviews?

Anonymous - It Worked

Thank you Kinoki, your product protects me from toxins. Being a magic user I am particularly vulnerable to toxins since I have low hitpoints. By placing these on my feet I can confidently attack rogues with poisoned blades without worry. Thank you Kinoki, because of you I was able to reach level 12! oh and my feet smelllll GREAT!!!

P.S. I am a caster and tend to wear light colored cloth robes, I prefer white. My robes use to be dingy all of the time and I couldn't figure out why. I now know it was all the toxins in my body seeping into my robes. I had always put off wearing my +8 magic +2 health +2 speed robes because I didn't want to ruin them. I can say I have been wearing my new robes and look fantastic. I think the elf across the way has noticed me. Any way, thank you again. My life is vastly improved from your man pads.

GDad said...

"My life is vastly improved from your man pads."

I no longer need to write. That anonymous figure has crafted the perfect English sentence.

The whole magic user thing is inspired.