Friday, February 1, 2008

Rex the Dingbat Dog

Neighbors Rusty and Kath are in sunny Las Vegas, and we've agreed to doggysit Rex. This involves only keeping him fed, letting him out in the morning, afternoon, and evening, and spending some time playing with him in the afternoons. Their trip was Tuesday afternoon through Saturday afternoon, so we're more than halfway through.

Rex wins the stupid, obnoxious dog award for Precinct 4, Small Town, Midwest State, in first quarter, 2008. Regional competitions begin next week.

He doesn't respond to any voice commands, or even to his name, even from Rusty and Kath. Rusty and Kath had to sequester him when Kath's parents were visiting, because he got a bit aggressive and nippy. When anyone lets him outside to do his business, he stands outside the door, whines, and jumps up at the doorknob for several minutes. Then, when he's done, and the human opens the door again, he runs away and doesn't want to come back in.

When I went to give him a treat, he jumped up at me. I told him, firmly but calmly, "No!" He ran and hid under a chair and glared at me. I put the treat down near me, but he wouldn't take it until I put it closer to him than to me.

Now, before anyone starts to feel sorry for him, Rusty and Kath got him as a puppy at a reputable puppy place, and they've treated him just as well as they've treated any other dog they've had, which is well, but not ridiculously so. Also, before anyone assumes that dogs just don't like me, you'll have to take my word for it that most dogs take to me quite well, especially since many dogs think I have the power to summon magic red dots from the little rod I keep in my coat pocket. In fact, even though we don't have dogs, GPop and I have kept dog treats by our back door to give to neighborhood dogs when they come over to play or to roll in something aromatic.

I may end up nominating him to be on the Dog Whisperer. Thank goodness they'll be back soon. I think Rusty has about had it. I wouldn't be surprised if Rex ended up going to boarding school soon.

Of course, maybe he's just behaving strangely to warn us about something we don't perceive. Hate to break it to you, Rex. We already know you're a jerk.

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