Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Open Letter to the Drivers on the Outerbelt

Dear Looky-Lous from a Few Weeks Ago,

While I appreciate that none of you actually crashed, I would like to point out a couple of important things.

  1. The box truck that had been on fire was out by the time you got near it.
  2. It was pulled over well off to the side.
  3. It was on the other side of the divided highway going the other way, until it caught on fire.
  4. You do not know the driver.
  5. Even if you do, you can't get across the road to help.
  6. That's not even accounting for the fact that if you could, you would NOT be better at helping than the first responders.
  7. And it's not your stuff that caught on fire.
  8. So it's really not your concern.
So, dear drivers, please maintain a reasonable speed. Slowing to a stop ON THE FREEWAY DURING RUSH HOUR is not an appropriate response to this sort of circumstance. There are no sabertooth tigers or advancing Mongol hordes. You may proceed.

Sincerely,
GDad

2 comments:

Shay said...

I so hate rubberneckers.

Bill said...

Good luck with that notice. If it brings good results, please let me know.

Sometimes it's easier to go with the flow than fight the current. To this end, assemble a picnic basket with MRE's, bottled water, Tang, and a pretty checkered cloth to stow in the back of your vehicle. Next time, you & the onlookers can enjoy refreshments & fellowship. A dijikal camera might come in handy, too.