And Counting

I appear to have 8920 days left until retirement. Fortunately, that's calendar days, not business days.

Vipers

We had a monthly happy hour this evening, and one of our special guests arrived during the snow storm (!) with the news that her driver's side windshield wiper had fallen off. Playing the Man of Action, I went out to Fix the Problem, which I diagnosed as "mechanical attachment displacement," or "the wiper fell off."

This windshield wiper was slightly more complex that the ones on my car, what with there being three distinct pieces, instead of two, so I examined the passenger side. In the snow. When I poked and prodded at the passenger wiper, it fell off.

Might I mention that this was a Cadillac Catera, so judge the quality for yourself.

I took in both wipers, and after several wise men and women examined them, we ended up putting them on the floor until after the appetizers. Finally, I took another stab at it and figured out that the wipers had to be assembled on the arms, not assembled at the table and snapped on later.

Also, we cogitated for several minutes about the location of the nearest auto parts store until I realized that there were four smart phones at the table with Internet access. Let me clarify that I have not had any alcohol for five years, so that was not the issue. I think it was something to do with the tempus fugit factor.

True Convert

Son now fully embraces Star Trek: The Next Generation after watching "Samaritan Snare," the episode with the Pakleds. We laughed out loud several times.

"He is smart."

Happy Birthday, Son

Happy Birthday, Son!

Nice Dinner

We celebrated Son's birthday with a number of really good friends this evening. Son wanted a good hamburger for his birthday meal, and there is a regional restaurant chain known for its variety of hamburgers.

Son now has a new guitar case and amplifier. This amplifier has many knobs and lights that do things I do not currently understand. We eventually figured out how to make the thing put out sound that was not distorted. You'd figure that would be the easy part.

Domo Arigato, Monseur

We went out to the local Black Light Indoor Mini Golf last night. Afterward, we went to a family-run Mexican restaurant nearby. It appears that the kids (college-age, maybe) who were running the shop were at least second generation in the USA, assuming that the family in question was actually from Mexico in the recent past.

While we were waiting for our drinks to come out, we quizzed Son on his Spanish vocabulary. He is in Spanish 2 this year. He couldn't recall the word for "purple," so we asked our waiter if he spoke Spanish. It doesn't pay to assume. He said that he did, so GPop and I practiced what little Spanish we remembered from our classes in high school or college. The waiter asked us if we were fluent. I think he was buttering us up a bit, but GPop and I (mostly "I") are not immune to flattery from an attractive young buck.

After our fine meal, as we were leaving, our waiter waved at us and called out, "Auf wiedersehen!" I laughed quite a bit.

Foto Phriday - Threek. Fork. Fivek.

We had a team-building thing at work this week. We met at a place where we learned valuable teamwork skills by cooking a meal together under the supervision of a very OUTGOING!!1!1! woman named Tami. The place was decorated up to look folksy and such, and there were several instances of oversized novelty kitchen items on the walls.

When I was a kid, we would jokingly call any fork with three tines a "threek." Of course, the fondue forks are actually "twoks." (tooooks) Behold the giant "fivek." (not "fiv-ehk," but one syllable)



Also, the SPOON! reminds me of The Tick.

Spring Flowers

Our daffodils beat our crocuses this year. Some conspiracy theorists suggest that squirrels have eaten the crocuses.

Missed It

I missed the fourth blogiversary a few days ago. Thanks for indulging me this long.

Angry Language Guy - Hypothetical Edition

I have a hypothesis. I think that the expression "dot com" has become so ubiquitous that it no longer triggers any response in most people. I propose an experiment where I will drop "dot com" into odd places in a conversation and see if there is any sort of reaction.

For example, "I would like the egg and pancake.com special with some orange juice, please."

If I can get a couple of data points on this, I will publish results. Unfortunately, this won't be a strictly scientific survey, since I won't be double-blinding the experimental subjects, but hey, it will be plural anecdotes.

Me as an Android

From Androidify...

Hilarious Tech Support Call

[overheard on speaker phone]

Tech Support: Thank you for calling Mega Corporation One internal tech support. How may I help you?

Patsy C: Yes, hello. Sometime between leaving last night and getting here this morning, the E key on my laptop snapped off the keyboard and fell off. I try to type, and I can still press the E to get it, but it's hard to do.

Tech Support: You know you can snap the key right back on the keyboard.

Patsy C: Yes, I know, but I don't know where the key is.

Tech Support: It's right above the D.

Quote of the Week - Philosophy Edition

In an online chat with a friend....

"Turns out I'm more buddhist than I thought I was."

Just Heard on the Floor

"Is it time to go home yet?"
--M.H., 7:31 A.M. (M.H. works 7:30 to 4:00)

Foto Phriday - Phashion phor the Holiday

This is my Slyterin tie. The lighting doesn't show off how my shirt is a very light green. Maybe something like the green square.

Saint Pat

When I didn't dress up in traditional Indian garb for Diwali, I didn't get kicked in the shins.

When I didn't give out red envelopes on Chinese New Year, I didn't get noogies.

So why do I fear for my safety if I don't wear green today? I did remember, though. I have a green shirt and a Slytherin neck tie.

Observations on Aging

I graphed how two items changed and are projected to change through my life.



Click to embiggen.

Happy Birthday, Grandma

Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday dear Grandma!
Happy Birthday to you!

Monday's Poem

This has been one of my favorite poems for about 20 years.

---

Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,
A medley of extemporanea;
And love is a thing that can never go wrong;
And I am Marie of Romania.
--Dorothy Parker,

Awesome Graphic

This graphic was on the wall of the gymnasium where one of Son's recent drumline competitions was held. I figure it was painted in about 1969 to about 1972, based on the names on the graphic and when those names appeared on other banners and such.

Foto Phriday - Old Vacation

Inside Toronto's Casa Loma

Only a Few More Weeks of Universe

SyFy cancelled Stargate Universe. Boo.

The Four Stages of my Life, Past, Present, and Proposed, Expressed as Eight Syllables

No tie.
Neck tie.
Bow tie.
Mai tai.

HTMLs

Son is fascinated with HTML. I think I see some possible career options that may be worth exploring.

Dates

Something in the interface between Google Calendar and the corporate Lotus Notes calendar makes it so that I have some meetings in Lotus Notes that are scheduled for the year 8762.

That is so far beyond Star Trek as to be risible. I think at this point, we're somewhere in Isaac Asimov's Foundation universe.

Good Deed Punishment Again

Here's a flower from on of Indira's plants.

Connection Photo

In case of small Borg attack, please use stairs.

Foto Phriday - The Kids Are All Turned Around

This is the picture of the kids turned around.

At the Gym

Two teenage girls, both about 16, and both maybe 100 lbs., were at the gym the other day. They seemed to be the type of people whose strategy for life was to look stupid and let other people help them. I sort of fell for it.

Girl 1: I wonder how this works. [Tries a couple of things. Looks helpless.]


GDad: [walking past] You put your forearms there, then lift your knees to your chest. If you're really ambitious, lift your feet straight out.

Girl 2: [getting up from the trunk rotation machine] I'm too short for this machine.

GDad: [glancing at Son, who is rolling his eyes] The seat does adjust. Here...

Girl 2: [uses machine] Ooooo... this is fun!

The Tudes

Fortitude
Aptitude
Rectitude
Turpitude