On Saturday, I packed up some toiletries to take with me on an overnight visit to my dad's. The toothbrush case slipped out of my hands, and as I tried to catch it, it caught the skin of my wrist and made a cut. I swear that I wasn't trying to do myself in.
This reminds me of my second-favorite Dorothy Parker poem, "Résumé."
Razors pain you;
Rivers are damp;
Acids stain you;
And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren't lawful;
Nooses give;
Gas smells awful;
You might as well live.
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