Monday, June 11, 2012

IMs of the Weird - Return from Vacation Series

GDad Lastname: How was the Griswold family vacation? Any sightings of cryptozoans?
In the "sasquatch" sense, not in the "microscopic animals whose genera and species have not yet been identified" sense.

Tallguy Martialartist: I did spot a little person Mr. T impersonator in Vegas.

We called him mr. t.

GDad Lastname:  HA!

Tallguy Martialartist: That's one of those jokes that only work over instant message or text.

GDad Lastname:  Too bad we don't project visible word balloons when we speak.

Tallguy Martialartist:  Now there's a superhero power that I've not seen before.  Of course the comic book version wouldn't work.

GDad Lastname:  It could. Everyone else could have the word line pointing to words that don't have a border.

Tallguy Martialartist:  The RV we rented was made by hobbits. I hit my head 2 dozen times.

GDad Lastname: We took an introduction to aviation class on Saturday. We have some interest in becoming pilots, provided we can find a funding source that doesn't draw down from Son's education or our nutritional needs.  The Cessna 152 was made by hobbits, as well.  It is theoretically a 2-seater.  I DARE two normal sized people to sit in it.

Tallguy Martialartist:  Flying Hobbits is the name of my new band.
I think the thought balloons would be creepier. 

GDad Lastname: I know MINE would. 

Tallguy Martialartist: But they would have closed captioning for foreigners. 

GDad Lastname: I once thought up an invention that riffed off of the "Closed Captioned for the Hearing Impaired" notice. 

"Plot Captioned for the Thinking Impaired." 

Then the cable news networks started their little "panic ribbons" across the bottom of the screen to tell viewers when to be scared and when to relax as the talking head was blathering. 

They used my idea for evil. 

Tallguy Martialartist: Like you wouldn't have. 

GDad Lastname: Yes, but at least the evil would have been to MY benefit, and I like to think that I would be an enlightened despot. 

Tallguy Martialartist: So did Roosevelt. So did Roosevelt 

GDad Lastname: You know, when you use that trope of saying things twice at the end of a conversation in real life, it sounds really ridiculous. I tried it out once in an attempt to sound avuncular, but since the listeners were all at least 20 years my senior, it ended up sounding creepy. 

Tallguy Martialartist: It was creepy. It was creepy. 

GDad Lastname: Touche. You win this time, Gadget! 

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