I would love to see a project where we could get Morgan Freeman (or perhaps Leonard Nimoy) to read messages from my spam folder aloud with light harp music in the background.
Wednesday, March 20, 2013
Tuesday, March 19, 2013
Thursday, March 14, 2013
Two nights ago, I dreamed that I was being pursued through the campus of Mega Corporation One by a malevolent cyborg. It had extensible arms and legs, but because it was part organism, every time it used its extending powers, it started to leak blood from the mechanics. I don't know if it was supposed to harm me or just harass me.
Later I dreamed that my car was severely damaged while in a parking garage, and my insurance refused to pay for damages.
Last night, I dreamed that I was somehow trapped on the balcony in the Vatican where the pope would be introduced. I tried to get away, but the exits were all blocked. The cardinals were leading the new papal cocoon up to the balcony so the new pope could emerge.
Extruded by GDad at 3/14/2013 07:44:00 AM
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
Tuesday, March 12, 2013
Monday, March 11, 2013
I was just on the phone setting up a concert for our Corporate Choir, and the activities director at the retirement home in question wondered if I knew her cousin who works at Mega Corporation One. I asked what this cousin's name was, and had to stifle any audible reaction when she said that her married name was (I'm guessing at the spelling) "Hymenbush."
I wonder if her other cousins are Connie and Anna Lingas.
Extruded by GDad at 3/11/2013 11:01:00 AM
Saturday, March 9, 2013
Friday, March 8, 2013
Thursday, March 7, 2013
Wednesday, March 6, 2013
Tuesday, March 5, 2013
I had a dream that the corporate powers re-carpeted our floor while I was at lunch. In the same effort, they added a special bathroom just for managers, and then took the sides and top off the elevators, leaving us with just a dark open platform that didn't quite meet real-life OSHA standards.
When I tried to find someone to raise concerns about this, I was soundly rebuffed.
Extruded by GDad at 3/05/2013 07:11:00 AM
Monday, March 4, 2013
Our team has decided that we'll confuse our boss by coming up with folksy sayings that are utter nonsense so that Boss will get confused when trying to figure them out.
"That's like putting masking tape on a horse blanket."
"That's about as useful as butter in a tornado."
"You might as well try to teach opera to an octopus."
A coworker just got a 1978 moped (mo-ped, not past tense of mope) working. He and I decided that we will start saying, "About as useful as a flux capacitor on a moped."
Extruded by GDad at 3/04/2013 04:14:00 PM